Wedding of the Century

We are headed to the “Wedding of the Century” as all the locals call it. Today is the wedding of one of Chiefs of Malawi, a wedding that calls the attendance of the President of Malawi and the King of Zambia. I just hope we can get a photo with them. We were given VVIP tickets by Professor George and Mrs. Flossy. Professor George frequently attends events with the President, Andrew and I have come to the conclusion that he is much more esteemed in society that we think…
Today is day two of Andrew’s birthday celebration so we started off the morning with a delicious breakfast of Malawian Muesli (chilled oats, milk, bananas, papaya, and freshly-squeezed citrus juices. We both enjoyed it very much!  

We ironed our clothing and dressed to our very best (given our backpacking circumstance) and gathered the few items we would need to attend the wedding (our VVIP invite to enter the wedding, our phones to take photos, and some Chapstick for Andrew.)
Everyone had dressed to their finest for this wedding. Everyone we know has gone to the tailor to have dresses made specifically for the occasion and all the women have gone to the salons to get wigs fitted to their head. Women here cannot grow long hair and most of them have really short hair as a result. The number one compliment I get from people here is on my hair. All the women love my “golden long hair.” I cannot even count the number of wigs I have seen here. I would say that 2 out of every 3 city dwellers in Malawi wear wigs, and every market is filled with fake plastic here. The villagers obviously don’t bother-wigs are expensive and they get in the way of their daily duties.

The wedding was amazing and we learned many, many new things about Malawian and Chichewa culture. We arrived at the wedding venue at noon, two hours before the wedding was scheduled to begin.

At 2:00pm the King of Zambia arrived and was greeted by hundreds of Chichewa women who were dancing and singing. At 2:30pm the President of Malawi arrived, and he was greeted by hundreds of Malawians wearing blue skirts adorned with pictures of his face. The chief and his bride arrived shortly after. The chief arrived on a throne, carried high above the shoulders of Chichewa warriors wearing yellow robes. In front was a line of Chichewa women wearing traditional red robes, hair beads, and face paint.

From the time they arrive until the end of the wedding just before dusk (around 5:30pm) the entire ceremony was about giving money and gifts to the couple. The couple was not allowed to take their seats until 1 million kwacha was pledges by people from the crowd to the couple (similar to an auction). One million kwacha is equivalent to $2000. Once the couple sat down the pledges kept coming…friends of the king were called up to give money, then friends of the president, friends of the vice chancellor, etc…

Even when the time came to cut the cake, each piece was raffled off for a small sum of money. I’m not sure how much they earned in those few hours, but they really made bank. They were even given two goats, a cow, a refrigerator, a bicycle, and a mattress.

The entire experience was incredible and I learned so much. Below I have created a list of everything I would want to be aware of if I ever attended a wedding of the century again…

1. Bring water. They do not sell bottled water at bush weddings and people do not understand that foreigners should not drink from the local village well.

2. The king of Zambia cannot shake your hand. He doesn’t even address the people himself, he has a speaker address the audience for him.

2. All the wealthy (modern) women wear large “English” style hats, probably as a result of the rule of England until 1964.

3. The more traditional women wear fabric head wraps that match their skirts. They are called mpangas, and I think they are absolutely beautiful.

4. The flower girls throw “gumbo puffs” instead of rice or flowers in front of the bride. Gumbo puffs are very similar to the American Cheeto.

5. The chief made his entrance on a thrown carried by traditional Chichewa warriors in yellow robes and tree bark on their heads

6. Traditional Chichewa women in red robes, yellow beads, and white paint on their faces dance and as a welcoming gift for the King.

7. The wedding colors are very interesting…bright blue, fusha pink, and lime green.

8. To greet the president of Malawi and the King of Zambia all the women move their tongues back and forth and make a screeching war cry sound.

9. Yogawa is repeated by members of the congregation to show respect to King.

10. Two goats and one cow were given as wedding presents from the ministry of agriculture.

11. Perekani means pledging money to the bride and groom (what the entire wedding was about).

12. The Wealthy throw money in the air or on the ground for the wedding party to collect. Hundreds of poor villagers sit on the opposite side of the wealthy and watch with open eyes.

13. Even the poor give their money to the wealthy wedding party. It is estimated that 20% of the income of poor people in Africa is spent of festivities. I can now see why.

14. There is no food, drinks, or cake for any of the guests. People must pledge money and approach the bridge and groom to receive a cake bite.

15. The Entire ceremony was about money and status.

16. The president and his wife gave 3 million kwacha, a mattress, bike, and a fridge to the couple.

17. The bride kneels while the groom stands to say thanks to the people.

18. The flag was retired when the president left, not when the ceremony was over. It hit the ground.

(Below: Andrew’s post)

Today Kylie and I had a once in a lifetime opportunity, to attend a chief’s wedding with the president of Zambia, Malawi, and the King of the Chewa people. 

Thanks to professor George and Flossy, we got a V-VIP invitation to the wedding and were able to attend. Kylie and I dressed in our very best clothes (pretty simple when you compare it to formal dress back home) and then set off with Gibson and the rest of the CBF office for the wedding. 
We arrived nearly 2 hours early for the event and found our seats to the far left of the main podium area. When we first sat down I was thinking something was up since our invites were different than the CBF groups. As we began to get settled, Flossy came over to us and bright us right next to the podium. We were incredibly close and could see everything now!

As the festivities began, tons of people began to flood the area. Many were sitting on the ground, but all were dressed in bright, beautiful, traditional clothing. 
Kylie and I felt a little out of place since… Well we were pretty much the only ‘white people’ in attendance. I put white people in quotes because I still consider myself Chinese despite the opinions of many here!

The wedding was an incredible cultural experience for Kylie and I, and we found it interesting to compare/contrast Western weddings with the festivities. One major difference, nearly 85% of African weddings are about giving the bride and groom money.
For example, the bride and groom couldn’t take their seats until a sufficient amount of money was raised. If you wanted a piece of wedding cake it was auctioned off at various rates (starting at $10,000 kwacha a piece until it reached $200 kwacha a piece). In total I estimate the couple raised $3,500,000 kwacha in bids (~$8000 USD). That’s not including the cow, goats, bike and refrigerator they were gifted.

The most apparent thing was the disparity of wealth in Africa. We were definitely sitting on the wealthy side of the audience, but just beyond the stands, chairs, etc of the wealthy were the poor. I wonder what they thought when the amounts donated would feed their families for 2-3 years. Or when one pair of ladies approached the bride and groom throwing $100-$200 kwacha notes to the ground. 

When you look at the amounts being donated you could say ‘well, that’s not very much.’ For example a donation of $50,000 kwacha comes to a little over $110 USD, a very large but not crazy wedding gift. But when 250,000 kwacha is a year’s salary for a regular farmer, that would be something like $11,000 USD as a gift! (If we were to apply similar comparisons).
While a great cultural lesson, I found the wedding left me with more questions about Africa’s situation.
Our ride home after the wedding went smoothly, that is if you count having to get push-started and a bumpy road as smooth… But hey, for Africa that’s smooth in my book!